The Definition of "Soon"

I had a nice organized post about the kids' schooling to put up but I'm not in the mood to finish it yet. Right now I am just feeling overwhelmed and emotional about the whole situation. I'll get over it soon, but I'm just reminded of part of Tim and Wendy's closing line in their podcast: "Foster parenting is the most heart-wrenching, all-consuming thing we've ever done but when it comes down to it it's all about helping kids and that's been the most rewarding thing in our lives."

We love these kids and it is amazing to see the changes in them. I've had people at the grocery store say, "They seem so proper!" Hah! I think it's funny. No kid is proper all the time but they are learning to be polite. Sometimes it's hard to see the progress, though, when you're in the middle of it and feel like you're nagging all day long.

back of Tres' hair 

I think one of the hardest parts for me, emotionally, is the birth-parent visit. I don't know why, but I have such a hard time leaving them and then hearing them say, "My mom said we're going home soon. I want to go home so I can have my birthday party," over and over afterwards. His birthday is in November. Today, we were in the waiting area and birthmom and Uno's dad walked in. Uno must have asked her again when he is going home because he turned to me and said, "See? She said soon!" Six months to a year might seem soon to an adult but not to a six year old! 

finger coils in front part of hair since it is cut weird

Josh later had a talk with Uno about the definition of "soon". Apparently, it didn't quite make sense yet since he asked if he could take my birthday cake home with him when he leaves! Poor kid. It kills me to see them hurting and missing their mom. They actually didn't ask for her until after one of the visits when she started promising big birthday parties for them. Now they talk about their big birthday party every single day! Prior to this all I heard was, "I'm not going back to that nasty place."

The kids' attorney came by and talked with us about the possible outcomes of their case. The bottom line is that we will know nothing until about six months from now when the court should make the decision whether or not to terminate the parental rights and put the kids up for adoption or send them back home to their mom. It's difficult wondering what will happen to these kids. If they go back home will their mom do the same thing she has done two or three times already, sending the kids to yet another foster home? Or who will adopt these children and how crazy it will be when they leave our home after finally being settled for a while? At the same time I have to think of the difference we can make in their lives today--right now, by loving and nurturing them and showing them what a good home is.

On a brighter note, Dos' hair is finally starting to grow in the bald spot on her head. We treated it for ringworm but still aren't totally sure what was causing the hair loss there. Finally, after using some special scalp lotion and some "Gro Strong Triple Action" hair is starting to grow there. Tres' hair is a challenge to do since I had never fixed a little girl's hair before, much less AA hair. It took me 2.5 hours just to do what is shown the above photos...while trying to get a 3 year old to sit still! I'm hoping it will last a week or two.